I have opted to stay anonymous to safeguard my identity from the ridicule. The previous night, I felt hungry and decided to make some ramen. I extracted the various packets from the bowl, added the flavor and dried vegetables, then put the bowl in the microwave. After about a short while or two, I noticed something was wrong. A horrible burning smell had permeated my kitchen. I opened the door to my microwave and…low and behold…I had failed to add water. There was some smoke coming from the bowl. Not wanting to waste the ramen, I went to the sink and put in water, which engulfed the room with acrid smoke for several seconds. I then put the bowl once more in the microwave and cooked it for two more minutes before attempting to eat it. Well…It went okay for a little while, until I found a clump of blackened noodles which had turned into some sort of peculiar crystalline substance yet seen in nature by humankind. I had a change of heart.